In the fast-paced, high-pressure world of technology, mental health often takes a backseat to productivity, deadlines, and the relentless pursuit of success. But what happens when the fear, burnout, and disconnection become too much to bear? In this blog post, we dive into a conversation with Ava T. Pommerenk, a clinical transpersonal psychologist and coach, who shares her insights on the mental health challenges faced by tech professionals and how to navigate them with authenticity and resilience.
Ava’s journey into psychology and coaching began in her childhood. Growing up in a large, working-class family in Hawaii, she experienced a dysfunctional home environment where emotional regulation and healthy relationships were not prioritized. Despite this, Ava’s natural intelligence and maturity led her to become a confidante for adults, who often turned to her for advice. This early exposure to human struggles planted the seeds for her future career in psychology.
However, Ava’s path wasn’t without its challenges. She initially entered the field of psychology out of a sense of obligation and fear—fear of poverty, fear of failure, and a deep-seated need to prove her worth. Over time, she realized that her motivations were rooted in codependency and perfectionism, and she had to undergo her own healing journey to find a more balanced and authentic approach to her work.
Ava has worked with thousands of clients, many of whom are in the tech industry. She notes that tech professionals often face unique challenges due to the nature of their work environments. Many tech companies operate under dysfunctional power structures that can be subtly abusive or exploitative. This, combined with the high-pressure demands of the job, can lead to severe burnout, anxiety, and a deep sense of disconnection from oneself and others.
Ava offers practical and compassionate advice for tech professionals looking to reclaim their mental health and live more authentically. Here are some key takeaways from our conversation:
Fear is a natural response to uncertainty, but when it escalates to panic or terror, it can become paralyzing. Ava emphasizes the importance of recognizing when fear is driving your decisions and learning to regulate your nervous system. Techniques like mindfulness, deep breathing, and grounding exercises can help you manage acute stress responses and make decisions from a place of calm rather than panic.
Many people in tech have spent so much time focusing on productivity and success that they’ve lost touch with their authentic selves. Ava encourages her clients to explore what truly motivates them outside of fear and obligation. This might involve rediscovering old passions, trying new hobbies, or simply taking time to reflect on what brings them joy and fulfillment.
Courage isn’t something you’re born with—it’s a skill you can develop over time. Ava suggests breaking down intimidating tasks into smaller, more manageable steps. For example, if you’re afraid of public speaking, start by practicing in front of a small group of friends. As you build confidence, you can gradually take on bigger challenges.
One of the most common sources of burnout in tech is the inability to set boundaries. Ava advises her clients to be honest about their capacity and to communicate their limits clearly. This might mean saying no to additional projects, asking for help when needed, or setting realistic expectations with your team. While it can feel scary to set boundaries, it ultimately leads to greater respect and trust from your colleagues.
Isolation is a major contributor to burnout and mental health struggles. Ava emphasizes the importance of building strong, supportive communities outside of work. This might involve joining a hobby group, attending social events, or simply spending more time with friends and family. Human connection is essential for emotional well-being, and it can help you feel more grounded and fulfilled.
Shame and perfectionism are common struggles for tech professionals, often rooted in childhood experiences or cultural expectations. Ava recommends exploring these feelings with the help of a therapist or coach. Books and podcasts by experts like Brené Brown can also provide valuable insights into how shame operates and how to overcome it.
At the end of the day, Ava reminds us that we are all human. It’s okay to feel fear, sadness, or confusion. It’s okay to make mistakes. Giving yourself permission to be imperfect and to prioritize your well-being is one of the most radical acts of self-care you can engage in.
Ava’s message is clear: the challenges faced by tech professionals are not unique to the industry. They are part of the broader human experience. By reconnecting with your authentic self, setting boundaries, and prioritizing your mental health, you can navigate the pressures of tech with greater resilience and fulfillment.
If you’re struggling with burnout, fear, or disconnection, remember that you’re not alone. Reach out for support, whether it’s through therapy, coaching, or simply talking to a trusted friend. Your well-being is worth it.
